


For As Long As We Have

by coolbreezemage



Series: Dimiashe Week 2020 [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Bittersweet, Dimiashe Week 2020, M/M, Nightmares, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:28:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23728309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coolbreezemage/pseuds/coolbreezemage
Summary: Dimitri had not expected that Ashe’s nightmares might mirror his own deepest fears.For Dimiashe Week Prompt #2: Comfort
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Ashe Duran | Ashe Ubert
Series: Dimiashe Week 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1709107
Comments: 1
Kudos: 38





	For As Long As We Have

Dimitri was more than accustomed to interrupted sleep. But this time, it took him several sleep-fogged moments to realize that the sounds of distress that had woken him were not his own. He turned and found his chosen knight and lover Ashe beside him, twisting under the heavy blankets, pleading incoherently with an unseen enemy. 

Dimitri jolted to full awareness, wilderness-honed instincts searching the room for threats. But no, there was a knight beyond the door who would have intervened had there been any real danger to speak of. He was guarded every moment of his life now, whether it was by Ashe or Dedue at his side or by a bevy of guards in the palace corridors. He wondered if he’d ever be used to it, ever be able to truly trust that he was no longer on his own. 

And neither was Ashe. Dimitri reached out, but thought better of it - though it made Dimitri’s heart ache to pull his hand away, if Ashe was dreaming he was being attacked, that might only worsen it. So instead he called out his name and waited, hoping to draw him out of whatever terrible thing had captured him.

Ashe woke slowly, a flood of apologies on his lips, though Dimitri did not know what could have prompted such distress. But he knew very well the torment of dark dreams, of memories of battle and loss and pain and the far more hideous constructions of imagination loosed from conscious control.

“All is well. You were dreaming.” 

A moment later, Ashe buried his face against Dimitri’s shoulder and stayed there, shivering. 

What should he do? He brought his arms around Ashe and kept talking, warm words his younger self would once have blushed to hear fall from his lips. He ran his hands up and down Ashe’s back, soothing his tremors, feeling his breathing slowly ease.

After some time, he calmed and the shaking ceased, but there was still an unhappy tension to his body, an anxiety Dimitri longed to ease.

“If it will help,” he started, uncertain but unwilling to stay quiet, and needing to hear Ashe’s voice, “will you tell me what you dreamed?”

A few moments of quiet, bridged only by his own heartbeat and Ashe’s still-ragged breath. At last Ashe shivered under Dimitri’s hands and spoke. “You… you dismissed me,” he said, quiet, as if it were some terrible confession. “Sent me away in disgrace because I’d done something terrible, but nobody would tell me what it was. I don’t know what I did. I don’t know what I did, I’m sorry…”

“You haven’t done anything wrong,” Dimitri said, hoping it could be enough to reassure him.

Ashe shook his head, still lost in something that had never happened. “I don’t know what I’d do…”

“I will never let that happen,” Dimitri promised.

Ashe made a small sound and pressed himself against Dimitri’s chest. Dimitri held him tightly as he fought free of the scraps of dream that yet clung to his mind and heart. “All is well,” he promised, and, “I love you.”

It struck him as some dark irony that of the two of them it was Ashe who dreamed of failure and disgrace. If either of them were ever to falter, to fall deliberately to darkness or damn them all through some grievous error, it would be Dimitri long, long before it would be Ashe. 

At last Ashe pulled away and resettled himself against his pillow. “I’m sorry. You were sleeping…”

“It’s all right, Ashe. I just wish I could have woken you earlier.” 

“No, I… Thank you,” Ashe said. He was smiling now, and that was what swept the last worry from Dimitri’s mind. Warm pride rose deep within him at this proof that he could bring such great comfort to others. He had spent so much of his life as a warrior and then a fugitive, more weapon than man, using his strength to kill and conquer. To know that his touch could soothe, that those he loved might seek out comfort from him… that was a precious thing indeed. 

Next to him, Ashe sighed, but it was not an entirely happy sound. “Sometimes this feels too good to last.”

That was something they shared. Had anything ever lasted, for either of them? Not family, not home, not school or battle. Loss was the only constant. No, Dimitri thought, not the only constant. There was also friendship, and second chances, and all those sweet things he had thought destroyed long ago. 

“I feel the same, at times,” Dimitri admitted. “It can be… difficult to accept joy, after having it taken away so many times. When you have it again, you always wonder if there’s something terrible lurking behind it.”

The new world that had risen out of Fódlan’s war was so fragile, so dependent on people from different lands trusting each other, on leaders doing right by their people. That was not something that could be held up by platitudes alone. But action and work and trust and care, that might be enough.

Even if it wasn’t… “I swear to you, Ashe, I will never send you away. Even if something happens to me, I will never leave you without means. And whatever comes to pass, you could succeed even without me. You’ve found your way so many times before.”

“So have you,” Ashe replied.

He had. Because of Ashe, because of Dedue and Byleth and all the rest, he had found himself again, and returned to serve his people. He could be here to protect Ashe after Ashe had done the same for him so many times before.

"Do you think you can sleep now?" Dimitri asked.

Ashe smiled. "I think so. Thank you." He closed his eyes and set down his head, calm once more.

Dimitri leaned over to press a kiss to Ashe’s forehead. How lucky he was, to have someone he so loved so close. Once, he would have bitterly dismissed such a thing as an impossible, fanciful wish.

However long this lasted, he would welcome every moment of it.


End file.
